Are you like me? Do you have to sing the Preamble of the Constitution in order to remember the whole thing? When you hear the word “Conjunction” do you automatically follow it with “Junction”? Are all your multiplication facts set to music in you mind? Then maybe you and I have something in common. I was raised on School House Rock!
I think School House Rock has done more for my education than all the years of Sesame Street and Mister Roger’s combined… although the Picture-Picture movie about the crayon factory was the BOMB! One of my favorite songs from S.H.R. is the Grammar ditty about Interjections. Everyone needs Interjections in their lives, and a few useful expletives too. Now I’m not talking the big bad cuss words, nor am I saying it’s OK to use the Lord’s name in vain. But even us Christians need a few strong words in our vocabulary to express forceful and explosive emotions. Sometimes “Rats” just doesn’t cut it.
With the creative example of my Minister-Father as my guide, many years ago I adopted “Crap” as my go-to expletive. It’s a perfectly good, useful alternative for… the Other Word. Now, I admit that I HAVE been persecuted by the Potty Mouth Police from time to time. You know them, those goody two shoes who never stub their toes and nearly lose their salvation in a flash of white hot pain. You know, those perfect people who never stink up the bathroom or slurp their soup loudly. You know, those sparkling examples of white washed sepulchers. They didn’t like my vocabulary. I didn’t like their alternatives.
So I’ve stood by my good word, and I’ve continued to use Crap even around my children. I said “Crap” just this week when my hairdryer that I just bought last Christmas burned out. (We burn out a lot of electronics here in Costa Rica… the power isn’t steady. That hairdryer was replacing another one that also burned up) I said “Crap” again when our router started smoking and we had to drop another 90 bucks to replace it. And I just said “Crap” again today when our microwave went up in an electric flash and a puff of smoke. That’s a lot of Crap!
It’s been a rough week. And like I said, everyone needs a few Interjections and Expletives in their lives for those times when something bad hijacks your day. Saying Crap doesn’t make me a bad person, it makes me a REAL person. So I’ll keep using Crap whenever the need arises. Here’s to the possibility of a better week ahead where no more electronics burn out. “Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah Yeah!”