After having 3 straight weeks of hosting teams and not seeing my husband night after night, we have a date night this week. We are going to the movies, and I don’t even care which one we are seeing. I just want to talk. I might “need” a coffee afterwards if I haven’t spent all my words yet.
I’m a pretty typical woman. I’m wired for words. I write in my blog AND a private journal AND a prayer journal AND I keep a notebook of quotes I like. On top of all that, I fill up with words by reading a lot. I don’t talk as much as most women, but I definitely talk more than my husband. When he’s not around much, I’m overrun by children in my life (both my own and my school kids) who all talk my ear off while my own words just bottle up inside. The pressure builds.
A few of the kids in my class are super random. They will raise their hands in the middle of a math lesson and tell me that they once lost a tooth at their grandparent’s house or that they really like swimming. “OK, back to planet earth,” I think. I can tell when I’ve had too many kid conversations when I no longer have patience for these random chatty moments. I know when my eyes glaze over and I can’t even humor the child that I am in desperate need of “adult conversation.” Date night is just the thing I need.
My poor husband, he feels like he has it so hard in life. I don’t ask for much, just a well placed grunt every few sentences to show me that he’s listening. But often times even that is too much to ask. I accuse him of not listening to me, and he repeats the last sentence I said just to prove that he was listening. I say that’s not listening, that’s repeating.
I no longer ask for him to tell me what he’s thinking. I consider that an amateur question that young, inexperienced wives ask their baffled husbands. I have found that I can continue a stream of thought without his verbal prompting or participating. I only want the grunt to feel like I’m talking to a human. My standards are low, I know.
So tonight I will unload the congestion of my thought life, empty 3 weeks worth of thoughts onto my husband. Pray for him.